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Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
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Chun.YuI felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What’s so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What’s so great about feeling and dreaming? — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
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Chia MinGuo Ting HuiPing Ling Quan Sandy Sook Fui YunHui
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Sunday, August 31, 2008
Don't overlook what's important to you & regret only when you lost it. Cherish every moment you have with your love ones. A story I came across while surfing the net. (: "On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.This was the scene of ten years ago. The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid, I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes. Dew came into my life. It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls. Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so.I moved Dew's hand aside and said, You go to select some furniture,O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At themoment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly,she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew’s body. This was the means of my entertainment. One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious. When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes. Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I ve got somethingto tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly. She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I said I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! At that night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew. With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which statedthat she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer. At late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again. She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one months time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see that our marriage was broken. She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms , she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning. I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form. I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for along time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face. On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer. On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.I didn t tell Dew about this.I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not becauseI was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it s time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked such intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I'm serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you. Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite.The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, "I'll carry you out every morning until we are old." Love is when the other person’s happiness is more important than your own. Feeling pretttttty tired. Woke up at 1.30pm and had been rotting in front of my com ever since then. Job interview tomorrow and they better hire me. HAHA. If not, I guess I'll be rotting in front of my com E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y. :(( That's such a boring lifestyle. Not only that, I need money and working will help me to get my mind of something. So, getting this job will be perfect. I need this job like how I need my lappy. LOL. Stayover at Xuehua house next weeeeek! :D Can't waittt. We would have much more fun if only she had passed her driving. All because of that stupid examiner. So fussy. :X Wondering why my parents are so nice? Actually, I only told them 事实的一半. AHHH, craving for donuts. (: I miss the donuts in FC6. And the BIG cup of grass jelly drink. Rainbow will only appear after the rain. So, let it rain please~ (: I'll wait for that rainbow. Beautiful things are worth waiting for. Saturday, August 30, 2008
 Birthday girl. (: Having a terrible, horrible, vegetable stomachache~ I guess I ate too much today. Lols. Woke up early in the morning to prepare to meet up with Xuehua and the others. Headed over to Plaza Singapura for lunch at Crystal Jade. Despite having had my breakfast/lunch at home, I still ate. LOL. Went roaming around the mall after the guys left to do their things. I must say that it's really dangerous to leave 3 women shopping in a mall. Cos' they would definitely end up spending money to buy things. :D ARGH. And I was feeling quite pissed off just now. >.< Anyway, met up with them and went over to Marina Square's Secret Recipe. Managed to give Xinjie a surprise with the cake that we had bought earlier. (: And, that was the biggest cake I had ever seen/ate. Ok, surprise me with a even bigger cake for my birthday. I swear I will be super shocked. HAHA. Sent her to meet up with her 4/8 peeps after eating the cake. We kind of caused Xinjie to be late in meeting her friends. Sorry. :X And opps, the pencil case that Xuehua and I had bought for Xinjie as her birthday present was exactly the same as the ones that her friends gave her. Seems like all her friends know she likes Winnie the Pooh ALOT. I remember something that Xuehua said just now. It's something like... “若你不懂得去珍惜，世界上一定会有其他人愿意去珍惜。” "If you don't cherish it, there'll always be someone out there in the world who is willing to." Kind of true, isn't it? XINJIE! Hope you enjoyed your birthday today. P.S Don't have to thank me for the wishes. I LOVE YOU A LOT TOOO!!! MUACKS. HAHAS. HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY TO XINJIE. Yes, my dear. You are finally 17! :D I bet you have been waiting for this moment to come ever since don't-know-when. And it's finally here now~ Woots, hope you will enjoy the day with us tomorrow. Girl, please be prepare. You never know what we may be doing... Wahahahahahas....... Lastly, stay pretty and happy. (: Friday, August 29, 2008
若不是全部， 我宁可不要。 Finally get to meet up with my lovely 4/9, Mrs Tan and Mr Leong today. (: AND I WAS SUPER HAPPY TO SEE RUILING MY LAOPO TODAY. Happy? LOL. They didn't change much. Chatted a bit with them before going off with Xuehua to shop around Jurong Point. Met up with Wong Har and had lunch. They keep on telling me that his sergeant is not bad. -.- Still having problems with my family. ARGH. How I wish that 1 million dollars would drop right down from the sky now. Or maybe just let us win the first prize for 4D tomorrow. That would be soooooooooooooooooo great. 突然之间，感触良多。 Thought about alot of things. Especially after what xuehua told me. I don't know. :(( Maybe it's time? Just maybe. Yes, I love to think alot. Reminds me of the song "想太多" which was sang by 李玖哲. Day dreaming is my favourite past time. Tomorrow's the day. The day before Malaysia's national day. :P I'm still wondering... :/
The clouds were really nice. Feeling better now. (: Even if it really happened *CHOY*, I guess I shall just work harder a bit. Find a job during this holiday. Or maybe working part time even after my holiday. Yups, that's what I shall do. Going for a job interview on Monday. Will be working at Expo for some events if I get it. It's far but who cares? Most importantly is that I found a job. Ah, lucks to me. 我会坚持下去。 因为我必须坚持下去。 Thursday, August 28, 2008
I hope what my mum told me ain't true. It's not going to happen. Hopefully. I'm feeling tired. Tired of all this. Seriously, no mood. I need something. Tomorrow will be better. Really? My brain tells me to run away. Yet, I just can't seem to move. I still want to stay on. For as long as I could. I need you. Please don't leave me yet... Do you know that you are so important to me that I can't live without you? Seriously, I don't know what to do if you were to leave me one day. I'm so used having you by my side that I wouldn't know what to do if I lose you. You were there with me through all the lonely nights, you were there giving me support while I was rushing my school work and projects and you were there entertaining me when I had nothing to do. You are everything to me and you are all I have now. I love you, my lappy. Don't die on me so soon. I still need you for the rest of my days in SP. :(( My lappy seems to have a problem cos' it keep hanging and the screen would black out all of a sudden. It's getting worse now. Some problems with the internet explorer cos' I can't open a new tab!!! ARGH. It's so damn troublesome to have so many windows. Not only am I having problems with my lappy, I'm also having problems with my earpiece. PROBLEM lahs~ After using it for 1 year plus, my earpiece finally spoilt. LOL. Time to get a new one. -.- Still, no money, no talk. Instead of waiting for my parents, I shall place my main priority in looking for jobs. It not only helps me to kill time, I can earn some extra money too. Woots, can't wait. I have sent a a couple of resume with the girls so the only thing I can do now is to WAIT. Well, thought I would be able to enjoy my holiday happily which turns out to be otherwise. Nothing stays definite. Lols. Photos taken yesterday. (:  Ping and me. I seriously think I look nerd with my spectacles. -.-  Ping, Yunhui and me.  Timothy being funny again. Lols.  Keng Lai, Jiajia and me. Keng Lai was fanning Jiajia and me while we were BBQ-ing. It's super hot~  Xiewei is camera shy. HAHA.  Our food.  Ping and me AGAIN. What shall I do tomorrow? I realise there's nothing I can do tomorrow. -.- P.S Sorry for causing you all the unnessary trouble. :X 是好朋友吗? Wednesday, August 27, 2008
你比从前快乐. Long post. (: Wee, spent my night over at Jiajia's house yesterday. It's a miracle that my parents actually allowed me to stay over at my friend's house. LOL. Shopped for the BBQ food at Commonwealth with the girls and guys. It's a real fun shopping around for groceries. :D Headed back to Jiajia's house to prepare fried bee hoon before going down to our BBQ pit. Just like the time we had our DBA/09 chalet, Jiajia and I were the ones helping to BBQ the food again. Ok, the guys DID helped us out too. Lols. It was really fun to BBQ though I got scorched by the fire a couple of times. -.- A really funny incident happened yesterday while we were BBQ-ing. There were 2 cats nearby and it kept scaring the girls out of their wits. Seems like I'm the only girl who's calm as I was still standing there doing the BBQ while the other girls were all standing on the chair screaming. All of them were like screaming at their high pitch voice whenever the cat is near us and this kind of frightened the guys too. Hahas. I guess the cats were attracted by the food so the guys tried to lure the cat away from our pit with our BBQ-ed suausage, chicken wings and cuttlefish balls! I remember Xiewei actually throw a couple of the cuttlefish balls at the cat. Like abusing it sia, but actually he's just trying to feed it. LOL. Ate till I almost vomit. There's just too many food to be finished off. >.< Packed up and off we went up to Jiajia's house to bath! Since most of us wore contact lenses while we were in school, we get to see how each looks with our spectacles after bathing! Like showing our true colours to each other. Hahas. Basically, we spent our rest of the time playing Monopoly and watching the concert DVD of 小猪，周杰伦 and S.H.E. I can only say that Timothy is super serious when it comes to playing Monopoly. I think all my energy was being drained while playing it. But well, it's really damn hilarious to play with him. Hahas. And O-M-G, I think I'm hooked to 周杰伦 and 小猪 after watching their concert DVD yesterday. Woots, I'm going to find all their songs. :D Played 2 rounds of Monopoly from around 1.30am to 6am. -.- And I only managed to catch a short nap when it's almost daylight. Before long, the guys were wide awake and calling us to wake up for breakfast. Had breakfast at MacDonald and off we went home~ They were still planning to watch movie today but well, I guess all of us were just too tired. Lols. 消失的太快, 我负荷不来. I desperately needs a job. Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Chatting with Steven on MSN and he told me about the 4 temperament types of human. It's kind of interesting. (: I think I'm Phlegmatic which he thought so too. Damn coooool. Do this quiz to know which temperament you are.  I am... phlegmatic . According to Galen's ancient theory of temperaments, people with phlegmatic temperaments seek peace and resolution in their everyday lives. Sympathetic, kind and adaptable to different situations, they often act as mediators in conflicts... Read more...
Oh yeah, lucks to him for his NS. :D  The beautiful fireworks. :D Yeaps, just back home. Econs paper was a total DISASTER. Even though I DID studied for it *I spent 5 hours sitting down to go through the notes*, the chances of getting an A for it seems pretty low. That's especially true when I actually forgo 15 marks due to the lack of time and my mind kind of blank out the moment I saw the questions. OMG, I didn't complete the paper lahs~ >.< But it seems that most of my friends didn't manage to complete some of the questions too. Still, I was pretty disappointed with myself. :/ I shall just pray H-A-R-D that we won't have to re-take this paper. It's such a torture. Met up with Xuehua and Xinjie after the paper. Headed over to Popular and the pasar malam at Lot1. Xuehua went to buy the Taiwan sausage and there's this guy at the stall serving her. And, he said something which gave us the creeps. The guy: "来，你要几条？够吗?" Xuehua: ..... Like so WTH, seems like there's some hidden meaning in it plus the way he said it is just sooo.... After that, Xinjie wanted to buy the sausage too but she was scared. So, I volunteered and he said the same thing to me and I just replied, "够了，一条就够了。" LOL. We were thinking that we should have told him that it's not enough and he can give us 2 more if he wants. :X Saw a car accident while we were on the bus. Shit man, I guess I really need to pray at a temple. I seem to be witnessing this kind of things pretty often and the worst thing is that I get to see an ambulance almost EVERYDAY. So damn unlucky. No wonder nothing going smoothly for me. OK, BBQ tomorrow with my clique and the guys. They are planning to stay over at Jiajia's house since we've got no idea what time the BBQ is going to end. BUT the problem is, I might not be able to stay over. :(( Which means, I might have to go home alone since the others would be staying over. AHHHH, I guess I would have to miss out on all the fun that they would be having if I'm not staying over tomorrow. SAD-ED. The other thing is that I've to travel all the way back home from Queenstown. So O-M-G lahs... -.- Wish me luck, hope that my parents would be nice to me all of a sudden and allow me to stay over at her house. Lols. OPPS, I've got something to announce. It's HOLIDAY~ :D Party, party, party! Looking forward to the stay at Xuehua's house. Ehs, that's possible only if my parents didn't suspect that I was lying to them. LOL. Not forgetting Xinjie's BIRTHDAY. (: The mosquitoes is still biting me. OUCH. Sunday, August 24, 2008
Closing ceremony of Beijing Olympic. Beckham, Leona Lewis and the fireworks! I love the firworks part. (: Omg, it's sooooo cool!! And while I was watching the ceremony, my brother just kept saying, "如果有炸弹，就很多人死咯。。。" -.- Like WTH, to think that this is what he was thinking of while watching the ceremony.
And I shall declare that Michael Phelps is my new IDOL. The good old days. 理智与感情 Everything has ended. When would it start again? I do feel better after the talk. At least I know the reason now. Still, I can't help feeling a little bit disappointed though it is better for us to remain the way we are in the past for now. At least you have to figure out what do you actually want. It's been just 2 weeks and so many things had happened. Super drama can~ I felt as though I've just woken up from a dream. A dream that seem so real. I told myself umpteen times but I just can't seem to do it. One thing for sure, I didn't regret. I guess the only thing I can do now is to wait. Tomorrow's Econs test and I've yet to complete my revision. ARGH. It'll be the start of holiday after tomorrow and I'm seriously wondering what to do for this 6 weeks of holiday. Honestly speaking, I've got no idea. Trying my very best to find programmes for myself during the holiday. Like, staying over at Xuehua's house during the first week of September. Woots, but you need to help me print it! -.- Just give me something to do so that I won't have to stay at home. The fact is that I don't want to stay at home for even a single day cos' I'm just so used to going out everyday. I wonder if I were to coop myself up at home, would I go crazy? LOL. I should have said that I want to go for the Sri Lanka trip. :(( That would have take up at least 2 weeks of my holidays. AHHH, someone tells me what to do for my holidays~~~~~ AND MOSQUITOES. I know my blood tastes bloody nice and sweet. But for goodness sake, stop biting me! >.< I really feel like eating prawn mee and DONUTS~ LOL. If you need somebody, I'll still be there. Saturday, August 23, 2008
I guess I wasn't as brave as I thought I would be afterall. Studied at ECP with Xiewei, Kenglai and Sandy. And, Kenglai was actually late for 45 minutes! -.- Today's weather was really cold cos' it had been raining for the whole day. Sandy and I were like shivering from head to toe. Especially so after being drenched by the rain when we went over to 7/11 to buy lollipops despite the heavy rain. Stupid rain, I still thought we would be able to spend some time by the beach. :/ Huiping and Timothy came and joined us later. I guess I could have concentrate much better if there weren't so much noise. Met up and I just can't seem to find the right time to tell him about it. OMG, I'm such a failure. Still left with few more topics. Shall go through all the topics again tomorrow. I need more time. Please. Xuehua asked me something just now and I was dumbfounded. I don't know what to answer and how to answer. That's the worst scenario which I would ever want it to happen. I hope to leave that as the last resort. Even if it happens, I guess I won't be able to do anything too. I shall just accept it. Let's see how things goes. I think I would be at ECP again tomorrow. Call/SMS me when you are done with your things. Or if you want to meet another day. P.S Sorry to trouble you. :X For now, I shall try my very best to mug for Econs. :/ I think I'm so going to flunk it. The consequences of having a lecturer who talks like a TRAIN. And yars! Thanks Ivan DA GE. LOL. The fireworks must be really beautiful tonight. Friday, August 22, 2008
你的心有一道墙。 Thursday, August 21, 2008
EAST COAST PARK (: Yeaps, headed over to ECP with Xuehua as Ruiling is not able to get out of her house. Lols. Coincidentally, the girls were planning to head over to WCP instead of ECP with the guys after their gym. Too bad, I was meeting Xuehua so I didn't join them. Shall join you guys for the party at WCP next time. :] Had MacDonald breakfast before heading for the beach. It's a really nice feeling to sit down at the bench, looking at the sea with the wind blowing into your face. (: Troubles seem to be blown away by the wind. Chatted ALOT with her and we saw some natural phenomenon too! It's damn cool!! Lols. Started to rain and we were drenched from head to toe. Kind of like 2 siao char bo. LOL. Bet Xuehua knows what I meant. :D We saw a few other people as SIAO as us. Like a couple eating MacDonald in the rain and a guy, who just finished swimming, lying on the table despite the heavy rain. Took bus13 and we almost lost our way back home. Cos' we were so engross in chatting that we forgot to see which stop to alight at. It's damn funny. HAHA. Both of us were like looking around to see where we were at. Passed by the shop where we had 豆花 the other time. Thought of getting down for some 豆花 before continuing our journey back home. LOL. Finally saw a MRT station after passing by don't-know-how-many stops. Hey, we are still capable of getting home even when we lost our way ok~ Lols.  The crazy couple who had Macdonald in the heavy rain.  And the guy who is too tired to move after swimming.   Lonely cloud.  Take care :] HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TO SANDY! (: (In advance) As promised, shall blog about the celebration yesterday. Celebrated at Fish&Co. Surprised Sandy by telling her that the guys are not going to eat with us when the fact was that they were already at the restaurant. LOL. Though she kind of suspected something is wrong while we were at This Fashion, we still managed to surprise her. She looked shocked when she saw the guys at the restaurant. Hahas. Thanks to the Fish&Co. crew, they kind of make the whole celebration even more meaningful. They make her hold a sparkle and stand on a chair while we sang birthday song for her. Kind of attracted the whole diners' attraction. Hahas. And I think the olympic fever is super strong, especially to the guys. Cos' they actually bought a cake which is in the shape of the stadium for Sandy. -.- Headed over to Istana park with them and we just sat down in the open space to chat till around 8 plus before heading home. It's a real fun to be with them. I love my friends!! P.S Sorry Sandy if the celebration wasn't that BIG. Still, hope you love the surprises we gave you. Hahas. Remember about us saying that we will meet each other at the same place again next year on 2009/2009? Let's try to do it. :D   The olympic cake.      The girls and guys. (:   Sandy and Huiping.  Sandy and me. And she actually bend down while taking this photo. >.< It's like all my friends who take photos with me have to bend down. They forgot 1 thing, I can tip toed!! LOL.  Yunhui and Sandy.  Jiamin and Sandy.  My clique. LOVE THEM! Thanks to all of you for the concern. Xuehua, Ruiling, Jiamin, Kenglai, Xiewei, Sandy, HuiPing and Yunhui. I'm fine now. (: It's really shocking to see that I've got so many friends who care for me. Especially the guys. Didn't expect them to MSN-ED me to ask me to cheer up. LOL. I bet the girls would know why I'm shocked about it. :X Still, thanks. Wednesday, August 20, 2008
 Xuehua found this photo of sunrise few days ago. It's really beautiful. (: Had my PACC paper earlier on and I'm not having high hope on doing well for it. RUINED. Headed to Dhoby Ghuat to celebrate Sandy's 18th birthday in advance. Somehow, I can't seem to enjoy myself today. Sorry to Sandy and the rest, I guess there are just too many things running through my mind today. :X Anyway, more details on the celebration after Jiajia send me the photos taken today. (: Went home by 190. Sprained my ankle when the bus suddenly stopped. -.- I think it's because it has been a long time since I've ride on a bus and my balancing SUCKS. Hope it gets well tomorrow. If not, I think I'll have a hard time on train tomorrow. LOL. Shall head over to ECP in the early morning tomorrow with Xuehua and ahBALL laopo. All of a sudden, I have a strong urge to go there. I shall give myself a break before I continue to mug for my Economics paper. "Love is too strong a word to say too early. Yet it has too beautiful a meaning to say it too late." A phrase I saw from Ping's blog. Nice. (: Quarrelled with my mum again yesterday night. I seriously feel like running away from home. It doesn't seem like a home to me anymore. I need a job. Any job recommendations? Disastrous. I feel so helpless. I thought you would be there, but you wasn't. I really miss you, but do you? Thanks for being there. 2008/2008 What a date. (: Going to have my paper in another... 12 hours time. OMG. After thinking about it for sooooo long, I've decided. I'm always that person. The annual fireworks festival is here again. Jiajia had been telling me about it. Hahas. Got to know this festival since 2 years ago. I remembered the first time I went to watch it was with him, Benjamin daddy and joyce. But, I guess I will give this year's event a miss. (: If I'm not wrong, France and Korean will be showcasing the fireworks this year. Do check it out, though the tickets are sold out. Lols. The fireworks is really nice and it last for quite awhile. You will get to watch till your hearts content. :D http://www.fireworks.com.sg/ "I'm always fascinated to witness how these beautiful sparks always never fail to create a fleeting romance capable of making viewers momentarily forget their worries." It's going to be hard. But, I'll still do it. Tuesday, August 19, 2008
I'm tired. NO MOOD TO STUDY. I'm so going to fail my PACC. Doom. I'm not that stupid afterall. (: Nothing left for me. Nothing. Reply to tags: Something really bad happened just now when I was on my way home. I shall not talk about it. :/ And yeah, luck to everybody who's taking the PACC paper tomorrow. I love this song. The melody just kept playing in my head. Please take care. 希望越大，失望也越大。 勇气，我需要勇气。 我以为，我真的以为。。。 Monday, August 18, 2008
尤其是这种天气，只会让我更加想念你。 Was all alone at her house and I thought she would be back soon. I'm really scare to be alone. No, I hate to be alone. That feeling is damn miserable. >.< Thanks ahBALL laopo for accompanying me. (: It's really nice of her to suggest accompanying me back home when she knows I'm all alone. Actually, no. It's because she thought I'll be in danger to walk home alone in the dark that's why she accompany me. Hahas. I'm big enough to protect myself okies~ And nobody would have any designs on me. You think everyone so TIKO like you? Bleah. Still, THANKS! And girls, I'm sorry about it. Actually, I just left the house not long before you called me. :X Anyway, I really appreciate that. Thanks. It's really touching to see so many people caring about me. Wee~ I'm so touched. Touched until I'm crying. T.T I shall pia finish my PACC papers tonight and prepare myself for the Q&A session tomorrow. Woots, I LOVE PACC. 1 more week to my last paper. :D I will take care of myself. I'll show you that I'm mature. Lols. I wouldn't want to be a burden to you too. So, don't worry about me. (: Jiayou. Focus on those matters first. I'll just wait patiently for you. Guan Yin Ma, will you please bless him that everything will be fine soon? P.S Found some really NICE photos of you just now with Xuehua. Now I know how you look like in the past too. BLEAH. :} Always here. Currently at Xuehua's house, using her lappy. Woo, I'm alone at her house. LOL. She's now having dinner at her Ah Gong's house with her brother. Lonely. :(( If only you were here to be with me. Yeaps, headed back to school in the morning to get some answers for the papers and cleared some doubts. The stupid thing is that, I left the answers with Yunhui. -.- And that means I've to meet her tomorrow to get it. NVM, they are going back school again tomorrow morning to meet our tutor. I guess I'm just feeling super blur today. For instance, I thought I didn't bring my foolscape pad so Christopher gave me some papers to write down the answers. And I only knew that I bought my foolscape pad like 5 minutes later after I took it out and put it back in my bag again. LOL. I was still telling Yunhui about it,"Eh! I got bring my foolscape pad lehs! I just now still bring it out to take out the exam papers which were slotted in my foolscape pad sia~" -.- Next, I bought the original flavour HL milk to drink which I thought it was strawberry flavour. Cos' the packaging is red and the only thing I didn't notice was that there wasn't any strawberry sign on the carton and this means that it's NOT strawberry flavour. I was still wondering why does the strawberry milk taste kind of weird. I thought it's spoilt. Hahas. My mum didn't bother to tell me she's not cooking dinner tonight AGAIN. Luckily, I called and asked her about it. @*#$^%$%#@ Still, no appetite. -.- They just don't understand me. Sunday, August 17, 2008
/EDITED HAPPY. :D Hearing your voice makes my day. LOL. Changed my blogskin and song. In fact, I added more songs to my blog. (: But it's so early~ -.- And, I've not really finished my papers. I guess those aren't important. The most important thing is to see if I'm feeling better enough to get out of the house tomorrow. I MUST go no matter what. I realise the stupid answers that they gave us are USELESS. Tomorrow is the one and only chance to clear my doubts. I hate to be sick. :(( I can't go out, I can't eat ice-cream, I can't study, I can't play, I just can't do ANYTHING. When I get well and finish my exams, I'm going to... Beach, K and eat my ice cream. Oh yars, WASH CAR!!! I've not forget about it. :D But as for now, I shall continue my mugging session first. Lols. I think I need a trip to Popular. And a sudden urge to have Macdonald breakfast. -.- Thanks for all your concern. I will get well soon. Suddenly, ALOT ALOT ALOT. (: ARGH. I was being woke up early in the morning by the Malay wedding that was being held opposite my block. Ah, headache. I can't even get a good rest. Not to mention being able to rest, I don't think I'm even able to concentrate on my mugging with all the noise that were being created. Omg, how to study? I need a quiet place man. -.- Didn't went to meet up with the girls cos' xuehua and DD were asking me to rest at home and get well first. LOL. Raining awhile ago and now it's all sunny again. A few minutes later, it became cloudy. No wonder I fall sick. Still, I haven't figured out why I didn't manage to get the answer. STRESSSSSSS. Hope I get better tomorrow~ I want to go over to ask xuehua about it. >.< Tons and tons of questions to be solved. Hohoho~ I didn't know I can be such a mugger. LOL. 8 more days to end of exams. I can't wait. :D Actually, I don't need the reward. Cos' I've already got what I wanted the most. Being with you. Relax & 加油！(: 我相信事情总有一天会解决的。 SMILE. I will stand beside you and stay with you. Giving you my support when you need it. Saturday, August 16, 2008
I saw another ambulance just now. Ever since that incident, I've been seeing ambulance almost everyday. I have a really bad feeling about it. :/ I didn't realise that my PACC paper is this coming Wednesday. OMG. To think I still naively thought that I still had time for revision. -.- Despite that I'm down with a flu and a cough, I HAVE TO MUG! The girls are having a study session at JE tomorrow morning. I am still wondering if I should go... AHHH~ Why must I fall sick at such GOOD timing? Went ECP for a short short while today. Though I wanted to stay longer to enjoy the sea breeze, the weather turned really bad and it started to rain heavily. I guess I've to wait till my exams are over and also to wait till I'm feeling better before having another chance to go there. No, I want to go over to Sentosa next time. (: It's been a really moody day for me. Things doesn't turn out to be the way I thought it would be. Seems like we are all fretting over things and that kind of dampen our mood. :(( Seeing you emo makes me emo too, causing me not to know what to do. =/ I hope things would turn out better for you. Though you didn't tell me what problem you are fretting about, I just want to tell you that I'll be here for you when you need me. And, I didn't meant to get upset just now before I get off. I just wanted to keep you accompany and you are worried cos' I'm sick. :/ I really wish that you would share your things with me instead of bottling all of them inside your heart. But of course, I won't force you to say it as I believe that you will tell me if you want to. (: I will ask Guan Yin Ma to bless that everything will goes smoothly for you everyday. Lols. 当时的我，真的好想抱着你。 I promise to work hard for the exams. I will make sure that my effort is worth it. I will do what I say. 我想牵着你的手，和你快快乐乐的度过每一天。 & I really can't afford to lose you, my friend. Friday, August 15, 2008
Opps, it's that time of the month again. With that and my cough, I couldn't be feeling anything worse than that. Just woke up from my nap and I think I feel BADDD. Cos' I keep SNEEZING! -.- The talk with the girls was ok just now, at least we manage to sort out all the unhappiness. It really takes alot, alot, alot of effort to maintain a friendship. And I hope the effort we had made today would help to bring us to be even closer to each other. (: No matter what we said today, it's all with the intention of trying to be close friends again. As a clique, I think we should really share things with one another and not just between you and the other person. So yups, let us continue to be les-partner and enjoy the rest of our days in SP cos' we are only left with another semester before being separated from one another. :(( Took neoprints together before going off. :D It's the second time we took neoprints together as a clique. Shall upload it when Yunhui finished scanning the neoprints. Thought of going to find xuehua after meeting them but I really need a good nap. Lols. Went back home, bathed and slept all the way till now. And yeah, another war at home again. What's with them? It just makes me feel like staying away from home. :/ And I still have to mug for my exam. How to study in this type of situation? AHHHH~ Not a little bit but ALOT. (: 有时候，我真希望我能快点长大。 I know you have MANY MANY MANY problems. I hope I'm the first person you thought of when you want to share your problems. I really wish that I'm able to share your burdens with you. But, I can't. Cos' you won't want to. You just wanted to face it all alone, not wanting to let any more people to feel the stress that you are feeling. But you know what? I wish I can face it together with you. I know I'm still young, I won't be able to come up with solutions to help you. Thus all I can do is, to stay by your side to give you my moral support. Do share your problems with me, if you want and feel like doing it. I know telling me won't help yet at least saying it out will makes you feel better. At least I know what you are troubling about. At least I know that you know I'm here for you. Somehow seeing you so stress up makes me... I don't know. I just hope I'm able to make you forget about all those things. I shouldn't add on to your stress and problems. That is seriously not what I should be doing now. What I should do now is to stand beside you and cheer you up. And be there for you when you need me. I don't expect anything from you. Cos' what you've done is enough to me. At least for now. Just concentrate on those matters which are more important first. (: Why can't things be a bit more simpler? 我知道我是个笨蛋。 I feel like going to the beach again. Thursday, August 14, 2008
I have been coughing for 1 whole day. I think I'm dying soon. -.- Yeaps, rot at xuehua's house today. Hahas. Spent some time without electricity and we both agree that the person who invented it is a genius. Seriously, there's no way we can survive without electricity. (: He came and woots, watched movie. :D That stupid Thailand horror movie is super gross. See, told you that Thailand movie is not scary at all. In fact, it's GROSSSS. EEK~ Lols. And I was shocked when he suddenly leave the house all by himself just now. I thought something happened. In the end, he just went to get supper. LOL. You are really clever to have guess about it. :X I didn't intend to tell you intially cos' it's a temporary feeling which I would get over it pretty soon. Still, I'm kind of happy that you are so observant. :] And Ping, I told you there's really shouldn't be any secrets between us. Cos' no matter how hard or how well you hide it, we will still find out about it sooner or later. I hope this matter won't end up the way it did with ahXIANG's matter. Perhaps if I've not keep asking you about it, you won't said it out too. Right? In any case, it's lucky you told us about it earlier. (: Meeting the girls at Tiong Bahru tomorrow. Hope everything will be alright after it. I know it's bad for me to think that way. :(( I couldn't help it too. OMG. I guess I'm just too sensitive. But I promise I won't think that way anymore. I feel so guilty :/ SORRRRRRY. 我想我真的想太多了。 你应该不会觉得我很无理取闹吧？ SOBBBBB, I want to go too. T.T Too bad, I can't. Boo hooooooo~ I still don't want to sleep yet. Wahahahas. By the way, Happy Birthday to JiaLiang and Hong Meng. :D Seems like a lot of my friends' birthday fall in the month of August. Still thinking of what to do tomorrow. Where shall we rot? Lols. Anywhere is fine as long as you are there with me. Full of surprises. I love it. HAHA. 爱可以很简单。(: Wednesday, August 13, 2008
I almost went crazy just now. They seriously drive me nuts with all their random replies. Especially so when I've got no idea what they are doing. -.- Well, ITAB test finished and I actually did a really stupid thing. Before I finished saving my work for one of the part of the paper, I went to close the window. OMG lahs~ I don't know what I was thinking about then. Luckily, it's only 10% of the paper. Hope it won't affect much and I still can pass this stupid module. Headed to Goodwood Park Hotel for the buffet. Seriously, I won't ever go there for their buffet again. It changed ALOT after their renovation. =/ Should have went for Sakae sushi buffet instead. AHHH~ Spy-ed on xuehua's brother after the meal. AHAHAHAHAs, it's really fun to do that. It's as if we were detectives. Lols. Don't worry, I will drink more water. (: I'm a happy girl. :D Monday, August 11, 2008
700th post. I'm really glad. (: Things are getting better. At least for now. That's what I think. Xuehua and I shall start planning Xinjie's birthday soon. 19 more days. XINJIE! Like what I've told you just now, be prepared. :D Heh heh heh~ *Evil grin* And shit, stupid MSN. All the messages I typed couldn't be send through. ARGH~ All of you are equally important to me. I can't lose anyone of you. Yeah, finished my EC test. I simply just don't know what that girl is saying with her accent. -.- Anyway, rushed to MRT to meet up with xuehua right after I've finished my paper. Accompanied her to IMM to meet up with her parents and also to shop for ahBALL's present. :D Both of us had a hard time looking after MEIMEI. Lols. Still, I love kids! (: It's really cute to see her riding on the animal rides. Hahas. Kind of forced her to go to Giant to meet up with xuehua's parents and we passed by a push cart selling cute hair accessories and other stuffs. Attracted MEIMEI's attention so both of us were like trying to take her away but to no avail. No choice so I bought a hair clip for her before she finally move. LOL. Headed to xuehua's place and I was practically rotting there while waiting for ahBALL to come over to collect her present. I wanted to go over to JP to find her but end up I didn't. Took photos with them when she finally came! :]  She hugged me while taking this photo! :D   Xuehua, ahBALL and me.  WTH, trying to give her a birthday kiss and she gave me this kind of look. LOL.  She wants to bite me! -.-     MEIMEI rode on this for 4 times. Lols. I still haven't had my dinner. Strangely, I just don't have any appetite to eat anything. -.- And yars, happy birthday to ahBALL aka RuiLing again. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RL! Happy birthday to my dearest laopo, Rui Ling! (: Quick, tell me what you want for your birthday present. I guess I will try to shop for it after my test tomorrow. Too bad xuehua won't be accompanying me. Hahas. I promise I will go out with you after my exams. It's such a long holiday, I don't believe there isn't a day whereby both of us will be free. :D P.S You are left with 1 more year to 18 years old! LOL. Sunday, August 10, 2008
Formal wear photos~ Finally received the photos from Jiajia! Enjoy. (: I swear I look weird in some of the photos.  Can you see how short I am in the group?! -.-    Future business women. :] .jpg) OMG, I look so damn unglam. WTH took this photo. Lols.  Gays gay-ing with each other. -.-  Timothy just loves to show off his butt.  With Candy and Shimah  Beloved Jiajia~!   Class photo~!  With 美女! :D  The guys. Look as if they are a bunch of businessman. Lols.  My Spreader Mallet group. Timothy with our mallet. LOL |
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But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay |
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